Review of the Game of Thrones Season 5 Trailer:

AHHHH!!! THE SEASON 5 TRAILER IS UPON US!! AND IT LOOKS AMAZING!!


Reminder: I have never read the books so all of this commentary is from the perspective of someone who has no idea what's happening next (or who many of these new faces are):




Things we learned from the trailer:

-Jaime is sad (probably because his brother just killed his dad)

-Some badass chick in the desert knows how to use a whip (one of Oberyn's daughters?)

-Tyrion is alive, but is a broken man :(

-Varys is plotting to get Daenerys on the throne and it looks like he wants Tyrion to help him?

-Littlefinger (creepily) tells Sansa to avenge her family

-Cersei is P-I-S-S-E-D

But as usual, her hair/outfit/face is flawless.

-Someone with blond hair cut their finger

-Margaery and Tommen are getting married

-Danaerys is going to break some motherf**king wheels!

-Her dragons are. freaking. terrifying.

-Varys and Tyrion have matching outfits, they're B.F.F.'s now:

(I am totally ok with this.)

-Ser Jorah is fighting someone in a ring

-Theon is still alive (ugh.)

-Melisandre is showing her boobs to someone (again)

-People in gold masks are attacking people in alleyways

-Jaime is being led into a giant, fancy looking building (Dorne??)

-Jon Snow is (still) really pretty:

Yes. Yes he is.

-Arya has arrived at a mysterious looking palace with a black and white door (Braavos??)

-Mance Rayder and his crew are going for a swim

-Missandei and Grey Worm are about to get. it. on.

-Daenerys and her group get ambushed by people in gold masks

-There's a funeral for someone from the 'North Wall crew'

-A giant gold statue gets knocked down





Questions for this season:
How will Tyrion adjust to his new unglamorous life away from King's Landing? Is that weird medical device from last season going to make The Mountain into some kind of super human zombie? How will the rest of the kingdoms react to Tywin's death? Can House Lannister survive such a big defeat? What manipulative move do Margarey/Lady Olenna have up their sleeves? How long will it take before Cersei goes full craycray? Does Sansa's new hair color mean she finally grew a backbone? Will Jon Snow ever touch another woman again? What swift and terrible revenge will Prince Oberyn's daughters bring down on Cersei/Kings Landing/The Mountain? Can Daenerys just be Queen of the Universe already? (Will she be getting more action from her booty call Daario?) Will Arya ever be reunited with her friend of many faces, Jaqen H'ghar? Who is Lady Olenna saying "they'll never even find what's left of you" to? WILL BRIENNE AND JAIME EVER BE REUNITED?



And the most important question: WHERE THE HELL IS GENDRY?!?!?!? (seriously though.)
Equally as important: WHERE THE HELL IS BRIENNE?!?!?!? (it sounded like her voice saying "nothing's more hateful than failing to protect the one you love" in the beginning of the trailer)
Important but not as important: When will we see Ser Pounce again?!?!

The real King of Westeros.

Season 5 premieres on Sunday April 12th on HBO.